A Jenn Adventure: I. Am. Ridiculous.

It seems there is a running joke in my family that I have become the butt of.  It's actually not a bad joke... it's quite funny and, if I'm being honest, it really does make me smile.. and laugh... at myself.  It appears I have turned into a "professional student".  The joke?  I like to collect pieces of paper with my name on them.  It's funny.  It really is!  It's also very ridiculous.  As I said today on my final day of pastry cooking classes (for now...) "It's ridiculous... I'm ridiculous.  No, really, I'm RIDICULOUS!"


Last month, I received official word that I would be getting an Associate of Applied Science degree in Hospitality Management - Baccalaureate Prep Specialization.  This degree was a complete accident.  I knew I had all the classes for a Hospitality Management certificate but when I met with the department chair and we went over all of the Hospitality degrees it appeared I might have all the classes I need for Bac. Prep AAS.  We just needed to have Admissions review my transcripts from UT.  A couple of weeks later, a letter arrived in the mail.  Complete accident.


During that same meeting, it was brought to my attention that I was 4 classes short of an AAS Hospitatlity Management - Food & Lodging specialization.  Also, all four of those classes were business related: Finance, Legal Issues, etc.  You see where I'm going right?  If my endgame is my own business and all I have left are business classes, why the hell not???


"But what about baking?" you ask.  Oh, I'm getting that too.  I have one class left that I'm taking this summer.  So, in August I'll have a certificate in Pastry Arts.  Hey, I admitted it... I'M RIDICULOUS!  I have been told by The Boss' mom (aka my sister) that I am not allowed to individually frame all three degrees when I'm finished.  I am however, allowed to photocopy all three to a smaller size and frame them in one single frame.  I laughed.  She laughed.  But I'm really going to do that shit.  Why not embrace my ridiculousness?!?  It's funny.


This, sort of, brings me to the "big question".  Am I participating in the graduation ceremony this weekend?  I can't help it... I laugh every time someone asks me this.  And it's not a normal "ha ha" giggly laugh it's that laugh I developed towards the end of my stint of working at the library that would just come out when something was really funny but it was one of those things you weren't supposed to OPENLY laugh at.  Yeah, that sort of snarky "I know I'm not supposed to be laughing at this because that sort of means I'm laughing AT you and not WITH you because you are obviously NOT laughing but I can't help myself and I really don't care anymore so I'm just going to let out this mini 'heh heh' laugh to show you I think this is stupid and I'm laughing at it... in your face".  Awful, I KNOW!  Unfortunately, that laugh has sort of become a part of me now.  I can't stifle it any longer.  Nor do I really want to.  ("Hi everyone... my name is Jenn and I'm bitter and jaded.)  Anyway, that laugh has started involuntarily coming out when anyone asks me about graduation and I feel the need to clarify.


I love graduations.  I really, really, really, sincerely do!  I think they are one of the most awesome things in the whole wide world and people should go to their graduations!  There is not ONE part of a graduation that I think is stupid or that I laugh at!  (Well, maybe the speaker at my School of Information's graduation... people were snoring.  I was bored and in tears the entire time.  And though I was probably, in fact, bored TO tears, I was mainly in tears because I had INSISTED that was the graduation I wanted my entire family to attend.  It was a disaster and the minute it was over with I profusely apologized to everyone who was there to support me... repeatedly... for days... apologized.)  That laugh is totally directed at ME.  Because I am ridiculous.  Really, I'm ridiculous and it seems ridiculous for me to go to a graduation ceremony for a degree I didn't mean to get.  These people worked hard for their degrees and though I worked hard in the classes that got me the degree I'm getting this semester, I didn't really work hard for THIS degree.  It just happened.  So my snarky laugh and reply of, "No, I've had enough graduations, I don't think I need another one." is 172% NOT meant to put down any graduation ceremony.  When I really think about it, I think I feel like this is a special occasion that should be earned and I just don't feel like I've earned the right to walk across that stage.  Also... my ridiculousness is potent enough on it's own.  It does not need to be encouraged and participating in this graduation would probably be like injecting myself with liquid speed.


So, for anyone who witnessed my laugh and remarks and thought, "Huh... she must think she's above this." I do not.  In fact, I think I'm undeserving of participating in this graduation.  A better response would have been for me to laugh and say, "No, this degree was an accident.  I love graduations because they celebrate the hard work you put into an education.  I worked hard but I was working towards something else and this just happened along the way.  It just doesn't seem right for me to participate."


Don't get me wrong though, I am incredibly excited to receive my degree in the mail.  Way excited!  And in August when I finish my Pastry certificate, don't be surprised if I participate in graduation, because that piece of paper I worked damn hard for.  But it definitely won't be something I insist or even invite my family to.  At this point, they've been through enough... ;-)


So, to all of my friends who are graduating this semester... CONGRATS!!!  I am soooo excited and happy for you!!!  You worked hella hard for this day and I hope you enjoy it to the fullest!


xoxo,
jennifree




ps - My group members and I received certificates today in class for making the most money in our class' bake sale.  I literally squealed, "Another piece of paper with my name on it!!!!"  It was mostly for comical effect.  Mostly...